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Artist

When I was around five we moved into a little circle drive. I know we lived in the same area but I barely remember our house before this one. I remember being friends with the girl who lived behind us, but I can’t remember any of our other neighbors. Our cul-de-sac has about 12 houses in it, I could count the actual number but it is dark outside and I am lazy. Ours was the third house to be built so we’ve seen almost everyone move in. This way it was easier to get to know our small circle of neighbors. Most of the neighbors had children that I grew up with, but many of them moved once their children grew. Now, I only know the neighbors that have been around as long as we have. I don’t see the neighborhood as much as I used to when I was running around outside. I wave whenever a car passes me but I never know if I’m waving to a neighbor or someone who’s just using our circle drive to turn around in.

My favorite neighbor is one I never speak to. He actually lives in the duplexes across the street from us. We’ve known him for a few years but I can’t remember how it started. He’s an elderly African American gentleman who sits on a bench outside his house when the weather is nice. We live off a busy street and as far as I can tell he just sits there enjoying the weather, observing the traffic, and talking to joggers who pass by. One day we started waving to him. I think my mom started it while I was in the car and then I waved to him too. I’ve barely spoken to him since I saw him across the street but I always enjoy seeing him outside. We know his name is Artist, he has a big family, a nice wife, and various health problems. He can’t putter around in his yard as much as he used to but he still likes to sit outside when he can. Today was the first day I saw him outside this Spring and I hope to see him more.

My mom and I tried to restart our habit of drinking margaritas outside at Chipotle when the weather is nice but due to a “city ordinance” we can longer drink on patio. It’s shocking but in this battle of the outdoors vs. tequila, I think sitting outside is going to win. What are you doing now that Spring is here?

 

A cul-de-sac sign in Dublin, Ireland.

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

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The Canary Yellow House

My mother listens to a relator every Saturday, even before my parents want to sell their house. This week he said that planting yellow flowers outside a home is a great idea. The color yellow is supposed to stimulate an urge to buy in the subconscious. Our house is going to sell instantly. We don’t have yellow flowers. We have a bright yellow house. It was originally a pretty, very light yellow color that was so cool that no joke people pulled into our circle drive over the years and asked where to get that color (only two people but that still counts). Unfortunately, it retired or died or whatever happens to paint colors. So when it came time to paint again, my parents picked a suitable alternative. That turned out to be a bit more yellow than expected. Its bright. It’s almost neon in some lights. It looks like a canary in others. When the sun is shining it is a bright yellow beacon. It’s very fucking yellow. I wonder if too much yellow has the opposite effect of buying… which is not buying.

I know nothing about real estate. But I have heard that homes are supposed to be neutral and that includes the walls. I’m not claiming to know more than my parent’s real estate agent, but I do wonder how high she was when she looked at our house. Okay, a number of rooms in our house did get painted white because of some reason or another the realtor mentioned. Yet our house is still a rainbow. She didn’t have a problem with the dark yellow walls in the living room, or the bright red walls in the family room. I don’t know what the difference between the family and living rooms are but that’s what they’re called for some reason. No one uses our family room which is right across from our bright orange dining room. I love the dining room.  It’s honestly my favorite room because it makes no sense.

We had an ordinary dinning room with white walls, a dark table and a giant hutch thing made of some wood I don’t really care about but looked nice. Then one day my mom decided she was going to paint these nice tables and chairs white. And the hutch thing as well. I thought this would make the pieces look cheap. She thought they would look cool and unique. We were both kind of right. And the dinning room went from white to orange. And then she decided there were going to be gold sparkles on the wall. The best part is that sparkles turned out terrible so they’re only on one wall. The hutch thing covers most of it but some of the sparkles are clearly visible if you look. I wonder if its going to be uncovered when people look at the house or if that’s just going to be a fun surprise for them.

So the realtor is actually a very nice lady and I mean the thing about her being on drugs as a good thing. Because I have no idea how our house is going to sell but she is so crazy and cheery and insane that I actually believe it might despite us and our bright yellow house.

What color is your house? Or what is the craziest room in your house or apartment?

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